swooooo...

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooon.

i am in MAJOR like.

top twenty-five of 2005

(in no particular order, and i'm sure i will add more.)

touching bill clinton's hand at crobar in december
having my picture in a ridiculous article in the "new york post"
having a photograph i took submitted in the flickrati nyc book
staying in new york (even when it was hard)
getting a job in my field
meeting my co-workers, roommates, and other new york friends
eating ethiopian food on my 28th birthday (and singing "islands in the stream" with my brother)
riding the cyclone at coney island for the first time (and screaming my head off)
visiting rockaway beach for the first time
chocolate and wine on j.a.'s rooftop
trip to athens in may (for a myriad of reasons)
holiday party with mona mour in attendance (and smoking cigarettes with matt & theresa by the window)
tracy's vegan pecan pie at the thanksgiving potluck
drinking 40s at the halloween party with a bowling alley in the basement (and noella dancing in the lanes)
temping for (and meeting) spike lee
the many "law & order" tapings in front of my apartment (and not being able to text scarny fast enough)
dinner at union square cafe (even with a forkful of foie gras)
scarny's many visits (and our time at revival and zen palate, especially)
road trip upstate to ithaca/farm sanctuary (and wilco's "jesus, etc." playing)
being forced to walk everywhere thanks to "strike 2005!"
attending a taping of "the daily show"
attending a taping of "saturday night live" (with vip seats)
attending a taping of "late night with conan o'brien"
beck & belle and sebastian show in brooklyn
seeing jeff mangum twice (!)

hiLARious

check it. (oh, and vote!)

btw, what the fuck is this "sweet, tasty treat" thing? i mean, i know it's the post, but c'mon.

when it rains...

i have two dates within the next 36 hours. one will be a bit more, um, public than the other. let's just say all of new york will be able to learn about it if they so desire. (though i'm sure they don't.)

oh! the strike is off! no more walking home in arctic-like conditions. i'm a little sad, though: it was the only thing forcing me to get exercise.

more soon!

an utter waste of time.

1 MINUTE AGO: i was on myspace snagging this from matt cherry's blog.
1 HOUR AGO: i was in h&m buying an outfit for tonight's holiday party.
1 DAY AGO: i was complaining about work to theresa and steph.
1 YEAR AGO: i was working a temp gig two blocks north of here.
I LOVE: my family, my friends, coffee in the morning, and natural peanut butter.
I HATE: mole crickets, mice, the deep part of the ocean.
I FEAR: being pushed in front of a subway.
I FEEL: anxious.
I HIDE: my diary under my bed.
I DRIVE: nothing no more, folks.
I MISS: porch swings.
I LEARN: to accept where i am very slowly.
I NEED: to use that free crunch membership i have and take a cardio striptease class.
I THINK: the thought of me in a cardio striptease class is hilarious.
FIRSTS...
First piercing: my ears at age 7.
First credit card: i was 18 (and i should have never started down that path.)
First enemy: my former best friend, cora, who stole my boyfriend, joey, in preschool.
First musician you remember hearing in your house: hall & oates.
LASTS...
Last long car ride: from ithaca to nyc in late october.
Last kiss: about two weeks ago.
Last movie seen: "brokeback mountain" (highly recommended)
Last food consumed: pear.
Last phone call: texas.
Last CD played: le tigre.
Last drink drank: venti starbucks coffee with vanilla soy milk, three splenda packets, and nutmeg.
Last time scolded: wha-?
SHORT ANSWER..
I AM: less anxious.
I WANT: to get to party city and buy some cheap-o decorations.
I HAVE: two and a half hours before i can do so.
I WISH: my apartment was twice the size and half the price.
I WONDER: if new york will ever feel like home?
I ALWAYS: put my pants on one leg at a time.
I DANCE: not nearly enough.
I SING: "against all odds" not nearly as well as i thought i did.
I CRY: on occasion.
I AM NOT ALWAYS: as sweet as i should be to my patients.
I WRITE: emails to noella every day.
I WIN: at dominos.
I LOSE: bets often.
I SHOULD: not give myself such a hard time.
FAVORITES...
NUMBER: one.
COLOR(S): black and kelly green.
DAYS: sundays (for the paper).
MONTH: november.
DRINK: coffee.
IN THE LAST 2 DAYS, HAVE YOU...
CRIED? yes.
HELPED SOMEONE? yes. (every day at work.)
GOTTEN SICK? no.
GONE TO THE MOVIES? no.
SAID 'I Love you'? yes.
WRITTEN A REAL LETTER: no.
TALKED TO AN EX?: no.
MISSED AN EX?: yes.
WRITTEN IN A DIARY?: no.
HAD A SERIOUS TALK?: yes.
HUGGED SOMEONE?: no.

tonight: holiday party!

tonight i co-host what will be my first party in new york city. i used to co-host parties quite frequently (or perhaps it just seemed frequent) in athens but have been hesitant to do so in the city, as my place is, well, cozy. anyhow, i'm sure i will have (blackmail?) photos to share with my dear reader(s) soon enough. it proves to be a good time, what with a blend of co-workers, family, friends, and acquaintances, all topped off by an appearance by none other than drag queen delight, mona mour! (oh, and rich from fourfour is supposed to be stopping by, too. dream come true!)

check what my roommate wrote in the evite:

The holidays are upon us once again, and this time we are going to celebrate them New York style...Red, Green, & Gold Bonanza. Yes, our apartment is a shoebox, but we'll be cozy as we pile in and booze it up. Hands above the waists, everyone!

So join Annie in her golden Christmas palace (the East has nothing on this chick, baby), Jen in her green-gone-wild den (she'll bring a new meaning to "trimming the tree"), and Andrew in his red-light dungeon (he definitely encourages hands below the waist here).

Please bring a bottle (or eight) of something to share. Egg nog (both vegan and traditional) will be mixed up by the gorgeous hostesses. And at midnight the round-robbing gift exchange begins. To participate, bring a wrapped $10 or less gift...this is a holiday on a budget, folks. Fabulous.

We hope to see you there. We've already called the paramedics and they're on stand-by. It's gonna be one crunkin' Christmas party!

btw, though i was rooting for the mta workers' strike (just for dramatic, chaotic, where-were-you-when-the-strike-of-2005-happened-purposes), it would have put quite a damper on the party -- glad they realized this and pushed the strike off 'til monday!

i am "culturally aware."

in response to a comment on my "fuckin' hipsters" page:
(source: gawker)

Give yourself 1 point for each question you answer yes, or for each statement you agree with. Just like Cosmo, add up your points and check your results at the end.

1) Have you ever commented on Brooklyn Vegan?

2) Without looking it up, can you fill in the blanks in this sentence:
The Dark Room is on _______ between _______ and _______, but why are you going there? That place sucks now.

3) Sure you’ve been to the Tribeca Grand before, but do you remember the name of the Saturday night party that, until recently, called the basement home?

4) You’ve seen David Cross and [enter favorite Stroke here] at a bar, but you didn’t make a big deal out of it, right? After all, they’re just dudes hanging out.

5) In the past six months, have you been to two Fader-sponsored parties? (anybody can luck into one).

6) The ratio of free Sparks or Red Stripe that you’ve consumed to the number of Sparks or Red Stripe you’ve actually paid for is 2:1 or greater.

7) Do you know who Gavin McInnes, Michael T and Todd P are? (Give yourself 1 point for each.)

8) Have you been in a photo, even in the background of a photo, published on The Cobrasnake or Last Night’s Party?

9) Do you know the name of the doorman at Misshapes and Motherfucker?

10) Do you know any of the details about why Death From Above had to change their name to Death From Above 1979?

11) Do you know what Cornerstone is?

12) Have you ever received anything for free — anything at all — from Cornerstone?

13) Do you work for Cornerstone?

14) Can you identify the fake UK buzz band in this group: Arctic Monkeys, Tiny Riot, Test-Icicles, Art Brut?

15) Do you know the procedure for gaining entry into the Alife Rivington Club and Nom de Guerre?

16) Famed graffiti artist Neckface designed T-shirts for a Williamsburg tattoo parlor that’s in the back of an art gallery on Berry and North 9th. Can you name the tattoo parlor?

17) During the summer season that somewhat recently concluded, guys: did you wear a T-shirt with a blazer? Girls: did you wear a pair of
cowboy boots that you had bought before July?

18) Did you DJ at a party/bar/club in 2005?

19) While having a conversation with someone in a bar, has the topic ever turned to how much you both hate Ultragrrrl, even though you both agreed on “how nice she is in person?”

20) Rejoice, the used clothing/record store now located in Williamsburg, was chased out of the Lower East Side because of surging rents. Do you know what LES street it used to be located on?

21) During CMJ three months ago, did you attend two separate parties DJ’d by Steve Aoki … in the same day?

22) Do the following letters mean anything to you: LVHRD?

23) Were you invited to the Subways show at the Northsix tonight by +1?

Results key:

0-4 points: You are a Normal Person. You can probably enjoy a solid hour of Top-40 radio without once considering slashing your wrists. You can talk to your mom about movies you both enjoy. You love hanging out with co-workers, especially when it’s something fun like Happy Hour in Murray Hill. You don’t think there’s anything wrong with living in Queens. You are mentally at peace at all times.

5-9 points: You are Culturally Aware. You understand what “indie rock” is, and you can walk by the Angelika or Sunshine and recognize some of the titles playing, but you always say “Oh! I want to see that!” and never do. You think the OC mix CDs are a great way to discover new bands. You’ve started blowing off some get-togethers with friends for the occasional show at Webster Hall and Irving Plaza. Still, though, you’re not quite sure why it’s cool to like LCD Soundsystem but bad to like The Bravery. You’re walking a fine line right now, and you could go either way.

10-14 points: You are a Hipster. You seek out the latest and greatest music, and you might have a blog. You go to shows at Mercury Lounge, Bowery Ballroom and Northsix several times a month, and most of your friends are hipsters, too. You have little in common with most co-workers or fellow students. You’ve gazed longingly at the Misshapes photo gallery and considered it — maybe you’ve even gone once or twice — but guest lists and Happy Ending after-parties are still a foreign concept, even though you’d love to be a part of it. You’ve stopped hanging out above 14th Street.

15-19 points: You are a Self-Loathing Hipster. You may not have “the look,” but it’s time to come out of the closet as a hipster. You’ve resisted this before, and you probably hate hipsters more than a little bit, but in the back of your mind you know it’s true. You’re already over M.I.A., the Go! Team and Maximo Park. You always know where to go. You’ll go to hipster’d out venues such as Supreme Trading or the Delancey to have a good laugh, but you also can’t dream of hanging out on a Friday or Saturday night at a place that doesn’t play cool music. Special DJ sets and parties at Hiro and Tribeca Grand bore you, but for some reason you’ll always find yourself there. It’s a love-hate thing. You’ve written about your complaints with the scene on your blog.

20-24 points: You are an Unabashed Hipster. Odds are you can’t even concentrate on this because the Bloc Party remix CD is playing through your Mac so loud. And you’re proud of it! You work in music/media/art/fashion/promotion, but the day job doesn’t stop you from going out 4-5 nights a week. You won’t touch it unless it’s an open bar. Either you’re a DJ or you’re in a band. Several of your shirts have no sleeves. For the most part, you’ve stopped eating.

25 points: You are the Hipster Messiah. Generations of hipsters have sung your praises and awaited your arrival so that you could show them precisely how it should be done. You are an immortal. Everybody in the scene has not only heard of you, but would probably recognize you even though they have never met you. Then they would softly whisper to a friend, “That’s such-and-such.” You aren’t even invited to anything because it’s just a given that you know about it and you’ll be there. You work with bands and artists, but only the ones you feel like taking on. You’re not a DJ, per se, but sometimes they’ll ask you to play your favorite records just for shits and giggles. You own more than one headband. When Maureen Callahan needs a quote for a Post article, she calls you. You consider “Bronques” a close friend. You should kill yourself.

we had a moment.

no, for reals, y'all. we grabbed hands as he walked off stage.

i can die a happy woman.

(check out my flickr page for more pictures.)

tomorrow night...

i'll be living the dream!

the ups and downs.

what a weekend!

first off, i broke things off with the agent. it just didn't feel right. i do hope we can build a friendship, but i'm no longer feeling anything more than that. after discussing things over at a local coffee house, we said our goodbyes outside the train station on 1st avenue and 14th street. while parting, a woman with an apparent substance addiction approached us and asked us for money. we politely stated that we had none and went back to saying our goodbyes. the agent walked down into the subway and i attempted to walk off. this is when things got weird: the woman stood in my way and wouldn't let me pass. i excused myself and tried to walk in a different direction and yet, she still would not let me pass. my heart started to race. she starts screaming at me, "fuck you! no, god damnit! fuck you!" this, of course, drew a crowd. a man ran up and stepped between the two of us so that i could pass and i started walking quickly down the street. i then hear the agent's voice: he has come back up the stairs from the subway and starts screaming at the woman, "leave her alone!" she starts screaming back at him, but by this time, i'm down the block and not looking back. he calls me twenty minutes later. the woman pulled a knife on him. fucking pulled a knife on him. after spotting the knife, he high-tailed it back into the subway.

my god.

so, that's that.

later in the evening, i attended a live taping of "saturday night live". originally our tickets were for the rehearsal show but we were bumped up recently to live. so amazing. granted, i haven't watched the show in a long time, but nonetheless it was exciting to see how it is put together. the best part? we had vip seats: only 30 people are able to sit on the floor where all the skits are being performed; everyone else sits in the balcony a floor above. (in reruns, you can see me in a turquoise sweater right after dane cook finishes his monologue.) i mean, "weekend update" was performed >this close< to our seats. i felt like i could have reached out and touched tina and amy, if i had been so inclined.

because we had vip tickets, we were able to line up backstage beforehand. besides the myriad cast members, we spotted gob from "arrested development," mike white of "chuck and buck" fame, and ben from "felicity" (kate moss flipped her lid over this). after the show, we waited outside the studio and after making eyes at seth meyers and brushing against "ben", kate moss and i decided to follow them and their entourage. we walked 3 or 4 blocks to the bar where the after party was being held and almost got in. in fact, we were just walking with the crowd behind seth and "ben" and seth says, "all of these people are with me." we walked in, and then the doorguy says, "um, wait a minute. what's your name?" and looks at me. out of my mouth spills, "uh, we're with seth." again, "what's your name?" i tell him my (real) last name and he looks on his list. asks kate moss for her last name. she tells him. he says, "just a minute" and walks outside. instead of booking it into the bar, we decide to fold and walk to the subway, kicking ourselves the whole way.

crazy.

oh, and congrats to my team! sugar bowl-bound!

fuckin' hipsters.

check out this picture and then check out the comment thread on gothamist. what do you think?

also, in non-hipster related news: on the train this morning, i looked up at a subway placard explaining how to go about retreiving one's lost property. there were graphics to accompany the information. along with the usual assortment of mittens, ipods, purses and the like that an individual might leave on a subway, there were also pictures of (get this) a wooden leg and a cobra.

amazing. i love this city.

diagnosis.

i have "an acute case of dramamamaitis." (thanks, kenniebloggins.)

i s'pose i do.

things are better with the agent. we're hanging out tomorrow night if i can muster up the energy. every night this week i've done SOMEthing:

saturday: yummy salad with with the agent
sunday: yummy ethiopian food with scarny, caro, and kate moss
monday: yummy pierogies and broccoli! with the agent
tuesday: yummy asian fusion food with scarny
wednesday: yummy vietnamese food with scarny and kate moss
thursday: yummy vegetarian soul food with scarny, kate moss, alabee, and latimer

so so so tired -- but it sure beats watching endless hours of tv.

so, tomorrow: hang with the agent
saturday: "saturday night live" with kate moss
sunday: alabee's birthday -- dominos and papa john's pizza in w'burg!

(bye, scarny! until, what? next month?! loved having you here!)

(btw, two new fave blogs. check 'em!)

airing dirty laundry.

okay, so if you like someone and then all of a sudden they turn into a raving, self-deprecating monster, i.e., "i have no idea why you like me," "i am so fucked up," "if i were you, i wouldn't go out with me again" but then simultaneously tell you how fucking amazing you are... you would believe that they aren't trying to preemptively end it, correct?

correct.

why is it that men like this are attracted to me?

i'm not sure where to go with this guy. i do like him, but honey, he's gotta grow a pair. (ooh, jen, that's mean.) as i asked him last night, if you like someone, why hand that person a myriad of reasons as to why they shouldn't like you back?

ugh. dating. now i remember why i dug staying single.

the weekend ends.

apparently, i cannot handle brazilian weed. got terribly high on thanksgiving; closed my eyes and felt like i was doing somersaults. zoned out in front of the tv for what seemed like hours. fell asleep on kate moss' rug.

the worst part? the agent was there and witnessed the entire thing. i'm so foolish.

the best part? he wanted to go out with me again. (can't tell if this guy is a keeper or plum crazy.)

we went out last night to enid's. had some drinks and dinner. i...

...

... really like the boy. he, perhaps surprisingly, really likes me, too.

ugh, it's all so cute.

tofurkey day potluck!

check out the menu, yo:

mushroom pesto
spinach dip
hummus
crackers and crudites
butternut squash, apple and brandy soup
rolls
tofu roast
bacon-wrapped turkey (for those meat-eaters)
gravy
soysage, apple, and cranberry dressing
mashed potatoes
brussels sprouts with caramelized onions
green bean casserole
apple cranberry crumble
sweet potato pie
hot apple cider and spiced rum
wine wine wine

jealous? it's going to be an event! first annual! can't wait -- oh, and the agent is coming. i mean, why not meet my best friend and my brother and about ten other friends or acquaintances after just one date? i mean, why not?

more catching up.

a) i haven't an idea how i got the "unfortunate dermatological malady" but it seems to be clearing up. it's called pityriasis rosea and it's caused by a virus. not much is known about the bugger. it'll be sticking around for a while longer but at least it's no longer spreading. ugh. delightful, yes?
b) "bonfire" seems great so far and it's fun reading a book set in new york while i , myself, am set in new york. i think i may read "catcher" again soon. any other suggestions?
c) i did, indeed, go on a date with my ex's booking agent last night and had a wonderful time. my ex lovingly refers to said agent as his "big jewish teddy bear." (i swear to you, my ex is not gay.) anyhow, the agent seems to be just as neurotic as i am. we have much in common, except, you know, i'm not jewish. whatevs! mazel tov!
d) yes, caddy: karma. it's all about karma.

catching you up.

no, kenniebloggins, i apparently do not blog much.

so, to catch you (and everyone) up:

1. i was accepted to volunteer on the hillary campaign -- had to send my resume to d.c. and the hq here in new york. word came down a couple o' days ago. i start on the 28th. if i get to meet bill i will fucking die. for reals, yo.
2. i have an unfortunate dermatological malady which is, for all intents and purposes, chicken pox without the itch. ugh. it will be with me for 6-8 weeks. jealous?
3. i smooched a boy last night who has been on "law & order". of that i know you're jealous.
4. i have a crush on my ex's booking agent. i have a date with this agent on monday, and we're going to a rather pricey restaurant.
5. reading "bonfire of the vanities" and boy, does tom wolfe love to use exclamation points!
6. !!!!!!!
7. going to volunteer with ny cares this holiday season; going to my orientation with kate moss tomorrow. karma!
8. i'm a little too obsessed with the valarie plame sitch.
9. i got a new cell phone. i love it.

i guess that's it. i'm sure there's more, but, well, no. maybe not.

where did holden procure his candy?

i hadn't really thought about the child contingent in the city at halloween; perhaps, in my mind's eye, they all boarded a bus to the 'burbs where they could trick-or-treat like the average kid? but no, on the way home from the gym tonight, i see a group of decked-out tykes going door-to-door at bodegas, grocery stores, drugstores, and bagel shops.

terribly depressing.

miscellaneous.

just got back from seeing "good night, and good luck" (highly recommended) and the preview for "brokeback mountain" made my toes curl in delight!

peanut butter bumpers cereal--found at your local natural food store--is yummy as all get out, especially when paired with vanilla silk.

going to bed early on friday nights ain't so bad. one can get up early and get a prime spot in the local coffeehouse, where one can read the times in its entirety and knit for a while. it's a pleasant way to start the morning.

no costume for me this year. horrors of all horrors, yes? halloween was such a production every year in athens. well, see, every weekend is such a production in nyc, so kate moss and i are just going to go out and get drunk. hopefully we'll find some boys to smooch on.

(though i hope to smooch on a certain boy tomorrow night--but we'll see if we hang out after he gets off work. he's trouble, folks. TROUBLE.)

anyone want to come over and do my laundry? i detest doing laundry. should i just drop it off again? it's such a bourgeois service.

oh, and GO DAWGS. we're 7-0. let's keep it going!

vacation '99!

a few tidbits i picked up while on my vacation upstate (and in the city, during sarah's visit, when i was not at work):

a) moosewood is TOTALLY overrated
b) who knew i could love tasting wine as much as consuming copious amounts of it?
c) i have a renewed interest/passion in veganism--for the tenth time in my life
d) the pig is my power animal and i have the pictures to prove it
e) i miss driving fast and urban sprawl (namely, michael's and wal-mart)--for reals, yo
f) polly disco is one of the best road trip companions ever; maisy wouldn't have been so calm
g) it's not a road trip unless you stop at taco bell for bean burritos fresco style!
h) lucas wineries is the disneyland of vineyards, and that's not a good thing
i) i never want to see that woman do the "riesling dance" again
j) soft rock stations are the best--but rick dees' top 40 ain't that bad, either
k) that one wilco song is fantastic--and i still freak out when i hear "your cover's blown" by belle & sebastian
l) turkeys have personalities--especially tom turkey with those pretty, soft feathers
m) on vacation, calories don't exist
n) the crate & barrel outlet is worth taking that bus up from the city (i'll never buy plastic kitchenware again)
o) eating is the main source of entertainment for most new yorkers--as was apparent through the eyes of an out-of-towner
p) vacations such as these must become an annual occurrence. next up? mexico! (or was it new mexico?)
q) oh, during a rousing game of m.a.s.h, i learned that i will live in providence, rhode island, in a mansion, with no kids, married to (censored), work as a dominatrix, and drive a rickshaw. holla!

s.m. and kate moss--feel free to add to the memories.

pictures are forthcoming.